Archbishop says nativity 'a legend'

The Archbishop of Canterbury said yesterday that the Christmas story of the Three Wise Men was nothing but a 'legend'.

Dr Rowan Williams has claimed there was little evidence that the Magi even existed and there was certainly nothing to prove there were three of them or that they were kings.

Dr Williams said: "Matthew's gospel says they are astrologers, wise men, priests from somewhere outside the Roman Empire, that's all we're really told. It works quite well as legend."

The Archbishop went on to dispel other details of the Christmas story, adding that there were probably no asses or oxen in the stable.

He argued that Christmas cards which showed the Virgin Mary cradling the baby Jesus, flanked by shepherds and wise men, were misleading. As for the scenes that depicted snow falling in Bethlehem, the Archbishop said the chance of this was "very unlikely".

An open letter to Dr Rowan Williams, Archbishop of Canterbury.

Hey Doc, thanks for fucking it up for the rest of us. Will you soon be visiting local day care centers and telling kids Santa is not real?

It's seems obvious that you don't have a fun bone in your body. The Nativity a Legend? No shit, asshat. But a part of the fun of Christmas is the stories that surround it. We all know that 75% of the story in nothing more than oral tradition, but we like it that way, and there is no need for you to go and shove it in our face that the real event was different than the way we all like to remember it.

For Gods sake you are a man of the Cloth, you would think that during this time of year you would embrace the things that bring us all closer together, and a shared tradition does that better than anything else.

We all know that you are "technically" correct, but you, who should know better, miss the entire point. If we want to add little fictions to the Nativity, so that it seems more real or more comforting or appealing to children, then that only serves to bring us closer to Christ.

Here is your Christmas present.